April is a very hard month for me...too many losses in this month over the years, so much sadness when it is really time for rebirth and renewal. When does one finish grieving? There seems to be no end to it, just coming to an accommodation with it. I always feel like I have found that space, that accommodation, but every year, April comes and with it the flood of memories, the thoughts of the missing ones, the missing all over again. I feel my heart full of the love of my dear ones who have passed and know that they too are traveling this journey along with me and who knows maybe soothing my soul until May finally comes and I can look ahead instead of behind. I am ever filled with hope that we will meet again one day and yet do not want that day to arrive too quickly! There is a lot of good life yet to live, places to go, people to meet......and I would not wish my life away with too much pining. Just this month, this April, every year I feel the pinch of loss.