Saturday, July 21, 2012

What Love Is

I am afraid for my friend . I saw her last night and she was not herself, snappish and seemingly implacably angry with her husband. When I asked her if she was OK she said No I'm not. A cold wash of fear swept through my soul and  I felt fearful driving home, with a sore heart for these two people whom I love like my own family. I was unsettled all night and awoke anxious with a vague feeling of dread hanging over me. I am feeling this as if it is happening to me and it is troubling my soul. I think that is what love is, being able to feel another's pain as if it were your own. I want to help, I want to make it go away, I want them to be happy, I don't want this rift to grow and cause a split that cannot be repaired, but I can do nothing. I tried calling her this morning and got no response, which worries me even more. It pains me that she's going through her day sad and lonely and confused and angry. I want just to tell her that I love her, to hold on, that she can work her way through this, to have faith in herself and the power of love. I want her to know that she is not alone, that she has a whole tribe at her back and me by her side, always. I just want to hear her voice. She has held me when I have despaired more times than I can count, allowing me to sob out my sorrows in her arms. Now I want to be the one who does the holding. Many times when standing alone, your world tilts in a different direction. That is when a steadfast presence is needed, a strong and sturdy love to lean on. That is what I want to be to this dear-to-my-heart friend, if she will allow me the honor.

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